Sentencing
15 years ago
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Go Carly!
Wednesday night was Carly's 9th grade Awards Night. She got an award for excellence in Social Studies and also one for having outstanding citizenship during the school year.
Here is Carly and her friend, Jill, showing off their awards. 
Dad, Carly and Kristin 
Jill's mom said somebody gave them too much sugar. LOL : ) 
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Happy Mother's Day, indeed.
I think I am back to my "don't-like-talking-about-my-feelings" self again. My mom always told me she thought it was weird that I never said how I felt or what I thought about stuff. I wanted to have something up here for Mother's Day, but it's one of those things that just ended up being too weighty for me to drag myself through. I miss my mom and the more I think about the future, the angrier I get. Jaron is having a baby, Carly is entering high school, Scott and Brooke are going to get married eventually and we have to do it all without our mom. How are you supposed to get along without someone who has been in your life, taken care of you, helped you, loved you literally every day since even before you were born?
There were definitely days where my mom and I didn't get along. When I'd come home ten minutes after curfew, we'd argue and say things to eachother that you probably shouldn't ever say to anybody. There were some days where we would laugh at the dumb things we did. We tried walking into Shopko one day and stood in front of an "automatic" door for at least 10 seconds waiting for it to open. We stood there like idiots until one of us read the big "Do Not Enter" sign that was in front of our faces. It was an "exit only" door. Ha ha!
When I'd get mad at her for not letting me go do something she'd tell me, "I don't care. I'm not your friend. I'm your mother." Brooke and I were talking about how kids now are out of control and they would be alot more respectable if they had parents instead of more friends. It drove me crazy then, but I totally see that it makes sense now.
I thought it was so annoying when I was little that we never, and I mean never, got to go to McDonald's when I was a kid. I probably remember twice in my entire childhood that she took us. She also wouldn't let us spend too much time in front of the TV. We could watch for like an hour, then she would make us go outside and play.
There were tons of things she would do that would drive me crazy, but every time I rolled my eyes, I would get this thought in my head telling me, "You're going to miss that when she's gone."
My mom used to carry this locket around in her purse with her mother's picture in it.
The whole week before Mother's Day I was feeling really crappy. On Saturday, I decided I was going to drive to the cemetery and have a "poor me" session and Scott called while I was on my way and wanted me to go to the temple with him. I kind of felt like, "Meh, I don't really feel like it but it'll probably do me some good." So we went and decided to only stay for half an hour because we were already hungry and it was getting late. I was fine until I noticed that one of the ladies helping had on the exact same temple dress my mom had....the exact same one she was buried in. The poor lady probably thought I hated her outfit because I just kept staring her up and down. Then I started bawling and she put her arm around me and said, "The blessings are so great, aren't they?" and I told her about my mom and that her dress was making me cry and she held my hand and told me, "I'm really glad you came today."
On Sunday I felt alot better. Brandon and I met my brothers and sisters and dad at the cemetery and I had made new "letters" to put up. The last ones were getting pretty weathered and the grounds keepers threw them away. We wanted to poke new holes in the ground to put the sticks in but it was too hard and we couldn't get them straight. This is how my mom's name ended up:
Scott tried shoving the middle "L" into the ground and it broke. When we put the last ones in, the groundskeepers had just replaced the dirt so it was soft and we were able to slide the sticks in the ground real easily. Not so much this time. LOL I'll have to think of something new to get them to stand up.
Happy Mother's Day, Mom! Miss you....
There were definitely days where my mom and I didn't get along. When I'd come home ten minutes after curfew, we'd argue and say things to eachother that you probably shouldn't ever say to anybody. There were some days where we would laugh at the dumb things we did. We tried walking into Shopko one day and stood in front of an "automatic" door for at least 10 seconds waiting for it to open. We stood there like idiots until one of us read the big "Do Not Enter" sign that was in front of our faces. It was an "exit only" door. Ha ha!
When I'd get mad at her for not letting me go do something she'd tell me, "I don't care. I'm not your friend. I'm your mother." Brooke and I were talking about how kids now are out of control and they would be alot more respectable if they had parents instead of more friends. It drove me crazy then, but I totally see that it makes sense now.
I thought it was so annoying when I was little that we never, and I mean never, got to go to McDonald's when I was a kid. I probably remember twice in my entire childhood that she took us. She also wouldn't let us spend too much time in front of the TV. We could watch for like an hour, then she would make us go outside and play.
There were tons of things she would do that would drive me crazy, but every time I rolled my eyes, I would get this thought in my head telling me, "You're going to miss that when she's gone."
The whole week before Mother's Day I was feeling really crappy. On Saturday, I decided I was going to drive to the cemetery and have a "poor me" session and Scott called while I was on my way and wanted me to go to the temple with him. I kind of felt like, "Meh, I don't really feel like it but it'll probably do me some good." So we went and decided to only stay for half an hour because we were already hungry and it was getting late. I was fine until I noticed that one of the ladies helping had on the exact same temple dress my mom had....the exact same one she was buried in. The poor lady probably thought I hated her outfit because I just kept staring her up and down. Then I started bawling and she put her arm around me and said, "The blessings are so great, aren't they?" and I told her about my mom and that her dress was making me cry and she held my hand and told me, "I'm really glad you came today."
On Sunday I felt alot better. Brandon and I met my brothers and sisters and dad at the cemetery and I had made new "letters" to put up. The last ones were getting pretty weathered and the grounds keepers threw them away. We wanted to poke new holes in the ground to put the sticks in but it was too hard and we couldn't get them straight. This is how my mom's name ended up:
Scott tried shoving the middle "L" into the ground and it broke. When we put the last ones in, the groundskeepers had just replaced the dirt so it was soft and we were able to slide the sticks in the ground real easily. Not so much this time. LOL I'll have to think of something new to get them to stand up.
Happy Mother's Day, Mom! Miss you....
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Molly's thoughts about death and the afterlife, part six...
On February 6, 2001, Molly wrote a reaction paper about a speaker who discussed Tibetan Buddhism.
Molly commented on the idea of reincarnation as follows:
"The idea of having many lifetimes somehow sounds relieving to be able to go back and live your life over and over again until you got it right. It would be refreshing to know that you get more than one chance to make amends. I don't totally believe in reincarnation as Terry describes it, but believe in an afterlife and the opportunity to live again, only not in another form or different body, the same body, but better, all fixed up."
She continues with this interesting observation:
"It was interesting hearing about our spiritual DNA that makes up our individual temperaments. Any parent with more than one child knows how unique and different each child is and how they react to things. So it makes sense to refer to this unique and individualized 'pattern of behavior' that we all possess as spiritual DNA."
I agree wholeheartedly with this observation.
It is also very fascinating to me to see how Molly's ideas about death are always intertwined with her thoughts about life and her experiences of others.
Molly commented on the idea of reincarnation as follows:
"The idea of having many lifetimes somehow sounds relieving to be able to go back and live your life over and over again until you got it right. It would be refreshing to know that you get more than one chance to make amends. I don't totally believe in reincarnation as Terry describes it, but believe in an afterlife and the opportunity to live again, only not in another form or different body, the same body, but better, all fixed up."
She continues with this interesting observation:
"It was interesting hearing about our spiritual DNA that makes up our individual temperaments. Any parent with more than one child knows how unique and different each child is and how they react to things. So it makes sense to refer to this unique and individualized 'pattern of behavior' that we all possess as spiritual DNA."
I agree wholeheartedly with this observation.
It is also very fascinating to me to see how Molly's ideas about death are always intertwined with her thoughts about life and her experiences of others.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Happy Birthday, Carly!
She's 15 now and keeps trying to get everyone to let her drive their cars! We went shopping on her birthday and her friends made her wear this sign and tiara around school all day. Then they threw her a surprise party on friday. What fun friends! :)
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Thank you Gearld Wright Elementary and West Valley Elementary
Some of the teachers my mom taught with from West Valley Elementary and Gearld Wright Elementary (Yes, that's how it's spelled!) got together and made us a quilt. Several people made squares that represented what our mom meant to them.
Thank you!! This means so much to us!
Thank you!! This means so much to us!
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Molly's thoughts about death and the afterlife, part five...
On February 27, 2001, Molly wrote a reaction paper for a speaker who had talked about hospice care for the terminally ill. In this paper, Molly tells us how she would have preferred her own death to be. She states:
"What a comfort to know that something like Hospice is available when one most needs to feel at ease. We all would like to be able to have a choice in the way we die. Hospice tries to make that as much a reality as possible. If I had a choice, I would like to be at home surrounded by family with the least amount of pain as possible and still be coherent enough to enjoy my surroundings at home with my family. It's nice to know there is an organization available that will try to make this wish a strong possibility."
The circumstances of Molly's death prevented her from having the choice she speaks about above. Even so, it seems that a greater regret for Molly would be an element of what she outlines in the following:
"I think it would be easier to die knowing you lived your life with the five things she [the speaker] described: not so much who loved you but who and how you loved, forgiving others and helping them to forgive you, showing others how much you appreciated them by thanking them and reminding them what they gave to you has meaning in your life, and saying good-bye. A lot of distress comes over the fact of not getting to say good-bye one last time. This does indeed help one to not just die better, but to live better as well. Living well helps one to die well. I think it brings more peace to one's heart and soul and less regrets."
I feel very strongly that Molly would have wanted to say good-bye one last time to those who she was close to. Some, of course, are people she knew for years. Some had been instrumental in her life at different points. Others may be people she knew only a short time. I think her heartfelt goodbye to all would have been framed within a sincere sense of how important each person is and her prayer that they find in this life those things that are most valuable and important.
"What a comfort to know that something like Hospice is available when one most needs to feel at ease. We all would like to be able to have a choice in the way we die. Hospice tries to make that as much a reality as possible. If I had a choice, I would like to be at home surrounded by family with the least amount of pain as possible and still be coherent enough to enjoy my surroundings at home with my family. It's nice to know there is an organization available that will try to make this wish a strong possibility."
The circumstances of Molly's death prevented her from having the choice she speaks about above. Even so, it seems that a greater regret for Molly would be an element of what she outlines in the following:
"I think it would be easier to die knowing you lived your life with the five things she [the speaker] described: not so much who loved you but who and how you loved, forgiving others and helping them to forgive you, showing others how much you appreciated them by thanking them and reminding them what they gave to you has meaning in your life, and saying good-bye. A lot of distress comes over the fact of not getting to say good-bye one last time. This does indeed help one to not just die better, but to live better as well. Living well helps one to die well. I think it brings more peace to one's heart and soul and less regrets."
I feel very strongly that Molly would have wanted to say good-bye one last time to those who she was close to. Some, of course, are people she knew for years. Some had been instrumental in her life at different points. Others may be people she knew only a short time. I think her heartfelt goodbye to all would have been framed within a sincere sense of how important each person is and her prayer that they find in this life those things that are most valuable and important.
Monday, February 2, 2009
The First Grandbaby...
...will be here in late August/early September!
Congratulations to Jaron and Lauren!
Sunday, February 1, 2009
I remember...
I remember listening to the radio and talking to my mom about how cute Jon Bon Jovi is.
When we would go on road trips, my mom would turn up the radio really loud and sing along, but she wouldn't sing the melody, she would sing the harmony and it drove us crazy. We would yell at her and say, "Mom, sing WITH the music or don't sing at all!"
My mom liked to put her feet on everybody. We'd tell her to knock it off and she would just do it more.
She would fall asleep on the couch in front of the window and open the blinds so the sun could warm her up. Then she'd grab one of the cats to cuddle with. We had only one cat that liked this. All the others were forced to cuddle against their will. "That's what kitties are for," she'd tell us when we complained to her to leave the cats alone.
When I was little, she would make me go to school in these ridiculous outfits that I hated. I remember I would fight and cry and she would just tell me, "Don't you dare change your clothes. You look cute, now stop it!"
When my mom and I were Christmas shopping one year, we got stopped at the mall by one of those guys at a kiosk selling rice bags that you heat up in the microwave to keep you warm. We asked him what was in it and he told us rice and tea. We looked at eachother and went, "We can make that ourselves." That's what we handed out to the neighbors and family for Christmas in 2006.
She really liked the movie Meet the Parents. She thought it was hilarious.
My mom would make us help her with yard work. She'd spend a whole saturday morning pulling weeds and edging the lawn and leave all the clippings all over the sidewalk and tell us to clean it up. We'd tell her, "You're the one that made the mess. You clean it up." That logic works for toys and spills but not yardwork.
We have peach trees in our back yard and my mom canned peaches for about 3 years in a row. I think up until last year we were finding jars of peaches in our basement that said "92" and "94" on them. They tasted just as good as they did 16 years ago!
I remember waiting for my mom to finish the "Beat The New Year" race with my dad and brothers and sisters in the blue station wagon. We'd go to the finish line at midnight and look for her. She always left with a T-shirt and a plaque that said, "I beat 1992!" or which ever year it was. I think she has four or five of them.
In junior high, I got big enough to fit into her clothes...and she could fit into mine. It was all free game from then on.
She told me she got kicked out of Disneyland one year for throwing a rotten apple off the skyride and hitting Cinderella in the head with it.
She had this horrible perfume that she loved called Emeraude. When she put it on it would make the whole house smell.
Her favorite flavor for anything was peach.
She would put fake flowers in the bushes in front of our house to "give them some color."
Her favorite drink was to take a glass of water, squeeze as many lemon slices as could fit into it and then add salt. I don't know how she even got the idea for it.
She really liked the chips and salsa from Chili's.
When we would go on road trips, my mom would turn up the radio really loud and sing along, but she wouldn't sing the melody, she would sing the harmony and it drove us crazy. We would yell at her and say, "Mom, sing WITH the music or don't sing at all!"
My mom liked to put her feet on everybody. We'd tell her to knock it off and she would just do it more.
She would fall asleep on the couch in front of the window and open the blinds so the sun could warm her up. Then she'd grab one of the cats to cuddle with. We had only one cat that liked this. All the others were forced to cuddle against their will. "That's what kitties are for," she'd tell us when we complained to her to leave the cats alone.
When I was little, she would make me go to school in these ridiculous outfits that I hated. I remember I would fight and cry and she would just tell me, "Don't you dare change your clothes. You look cute, now stop it!"
When my mom and I were Christmas shopping one year, we got stopped at the mall by one of those guys at a kiosk selling rice bags that you heat up in the microwave to keep you warm. We asked him what was in it and he told us rice and tea. We looked at eachother and went, "We can make that ourselves." That's what we handed out to the neighbors and family for Christmas in 2006.
She really liked the movie Meet the Parents. She thought it was hilarious.
My mom would make us help her with yard work. She'd spend a whole saturday morning pulling weeds and edging the lawn and leave all the clippings all over the sidewalk and tell us to clean it up. We'd tell her, "You're the one that made the mess. You clean it up." That logic works for toys and spills but not yardwork.
We have peach trees in our back yard and my mom canned peaches for about 3 years in a row. I think up until last year we were finding jars of peaches in our basement that said "92" and "94" on them. They tasted just as good as they did 16 years ago!
I remember waiting for my mom to finish the "Beat The New Year" race with my dad and brothers and sisters in the blue station wagon. We'd go to the finish line at midnight and look for her. She always left with a T-shirt and a plaque that said, "I beat 1992!" or which ever year it was. I think she has four or five of them.
In junior high, I got big enough to fit into her clothes...and she could fit into mine. It was all free game from then on.
She told me she got kicked out of Disneyland one year for throwing a rotten apple off the skyride and hitting Cinderella in the head with it.
She had this horrible perfume that she loved called Emeraude. When she put it on it would make the whole house smell.
Her favorite flavor for anything was peach.
She would put fake flowers in the bushes in front of our house to "give them some color."
Her favorite drink was to take a glass of water, squeeze as many lemon slices as could fit into it and then add salt. I don't know how she even got the idea for it.
She really liked the chips and salsa from Chili's.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
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